paper, scissors, EKG

In our giant conglomerate of a hospital, where everyone has a very detailed and specific job, all the way down to the most specialized advanced technicians who do only one type of tiny fetal heart ultrasound all day, every day, it never ceases to amaze me how fast things can fall apart on the weekend, when all the special people are off. Gone to the lake, I imagine.

On Monday through Friday, when I order a stat! EKG (heart tracing), it takes all of 30 seconds for someone to wheel through the door with the machine, slap on the stickers and hand me a tracing. Blink, and it's over.

But on Saturday and Sunday, this hospital-wide job falls to us INTERNS. Which is scary because #1 no one ever really teaches you how to do it and #2 we are interns.

So this morning, while I was rounding with our Neurosurgery attending, I got a page stat! EKG.

Holy crap I haven't done this since July.

I heaved my charts into the open arms of my surprised senior resident, ran down the hall and out of the wards over to the critical care building where I hiked a flight of stairs up to the heart unit for kids (CVICU). One of the other interns helped me find the EKG machine, and I tried to quickly browse the manual.

Here goes nothing!

So a hauled it back down to the wards and finally made it to the kid's room--a 15 year old with kidney disease.

"Oh man! I just had one of these yesterday! I was going to go to the Teen Room!"

"I'm sorry. I guess your doctor wants another one today. Are you having any chest pain."

"Nope" :::starts taking off her shirt and raising up the head of the bed:::

"Alright, let me just plug this thing in..."

"They usually do it on this side" (points to her right)

"Thanks."

I slowly start to apply the 12-lead EKG stickers in the pattern described in the manual. Obviously, I am not quick enough, and she takes the pack of stickers from my hand and starts sticking them on herself.

"Here. Right arm. Left arm. Right leg..."

"Oh. Hey. Thanks!"

"Whatever.... Am I cool?"

"Ummm..I think so...But any chance you know how to read an EKG too?"



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